All in all the Parrot family did okay for Christmas prezzies. I won’t bore you with the details other than to say that one of my favourites is “Is it just me or is everything shit?“, the encyclopedia of modern life by Steve Love and Alan McArthur. It’s a grumpy old git of a read, but funny, entertaining and a jaundiced view of the world that strangely resonates.
I’m only up to the letter C category, but one of my favourites is number six on the list of “The 10 definitive Reasons Why Tony Blair Is Fucking Rubbish”:
The way he exorts everyone to Think The Unthinkable – unless this means thinking anything he doesn’t think himself, which is genuinely unthinkable. What Blair defines as Unthinkable (capital U) are things most of the rest of us think are unthinkable (are you keeping up?). Things that Mr B finds unthinkable (lower case) actually qualify as some kind of Thought Crime. So it’s Unthinkable (that is thinkable) to charge tuition/top up fees to go to university. But it’s unthinkable (lower case) to fund education by taxing the wealthy and big business. So, to sum up, Thinking The Unthinkable means Thinking Thatcherite. But Blair can’t say that because it would be honest and unpopular. And that would be unthinkable.
I’ve often thought the unthinkable – that TTU is one of the most fatuous phrases in use today since it seems to refer to the habit of our two main political parties borrowing policies from each other and dressing them up as their own. Hence Dave the Green and Tony the Public Sector Privateer. Bizarre.