Crackers

We always plan to light every time we go away, but it never seems to work that way. There is always something else t0 throw in the packing “just in case.”

For me, the problem is books. I have this mini library of titles that I must get round to reading some day and holidays always seem like the prefect opportunity. But I have to have a wide selection of fiction and non-fiction because I don’t know what reading mood I’ll be in and the upshot is I end up taking more books than I can possibly read in the time available.

We also take things that might not be available in less civilised parts of the globe. A corkscrew for example, or resealable plastic bags in which to store unspecified things.

But at least we don’t insist on taking reminders of home like one couple we once met on holiday. As well as teabags and biscuits, they’s also brought a catering pack of frozen bacon, enough to cater for breakfast for the duration.

Back to today, we’ve managed to get everything into our suitcases with room to spare and there is just the hand luggage left which should have contained this journey’s eccentric items, namely three Christmas crackers.

We promised our daughter that we’d have the Christmas dinner that she missed while she was away and thought it would be a nice surprise if we took along some festive crackers.

And very nice ones they are too. Expensive Marks & Spencer crackers that light up which we bought for half price.

However, it occurred to me that taking them in the hand luggage risks getting us arrested as terrorists since they’re now classified as explosives. You have to be aged over 16 just to buy them for goodness sake, let alone take them on an aeroplane.

So we’re left with three options: 1) pack them in the hold luggage and get them crushed, 2) remove the ‘snaps’ and make the bang noises ourselves, or 3) forget it and save them for next Christmas.

The last option is favourite, something else that Osama bin Laden has to answer for.


Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

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