For the most part, they consist of people wearing dinner jackets or long frocks strutting on red carpets and smiling condescendingly for cameras. Next they’re grinning through gritted teeth because they came second or blubbing on stage because they’ve won.
What is being offered to us as entertainment is a bunch of people being themselves, rather than being other people which is what actors actually get paid for.
From this, you will gather that I won’t be following the Oscars tonight. The brief film clips we’re shown just isn’t a big enough pay-off for all the luvvieness we have to endure.
But that doesn’t mean that I’m not paying attention and any actor worth his or her salt would do well to study the types of role most likely to win them a gold-plated, Britannium statuette.
An analysis of previous best actor/actress roles points the way.
For a start, they should choose a film role that depicts a real person, preferably royalty or a politician with a disability. One who is also an alcoholic would be ideal and Winston Churchill springs to mind.
Being a widower or a single parent also helps enormously and male actors should seek out a military role, while actresses should definitely consider playing a prostitute or a mistress.
A role as a religious figure might not rule you out of the running, but the odds will be stacked against you.
To read more, go to How to Win an Oscar on the BBC website.