To Do List

To Do ListI’ve been humming and ahhing about whether I should write about my feelings on the anachronism that is the monarchy, but that would be churlish on HMtQ’s diamond jubilee, even if that’s what prompted the thought in the first place.

So instead here is a list of things I hope to do one day, shamelessly lifted from Pinterest:

  1. Buy a horse. Name it ‘Thunder Takes the Lead’. Enter it in horse races.
  2. Become a doctor. Change my last name to Acula.
  3. Make vanilla Angel Delight. Put it in a mayo jar. Eat with a spoon in public.
  4. Buy a parrot. Teach it to say ‘Help! I’ve been turned into a parrot!’
  5. Change my name to Simon. Speak in third person.
  6. Get a walk-in wardrobe. Design the inside to look like Narnia.
  7. Purposely spell words slightly wrong and add them to the office Microsoft Word dictionary.
  8. Run into a shop and ask what year it is. When someone answers, shout ‘It worked!’ and run out cheering.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

6 comments… Add yours
  • Roger Green 3rd June 2012

    well, 3, 7 and 8 do seem quite doable. You should do 8 today, in fact.

    Reply
  • Spotted Dick Pudding 3rd June 2012

    Ha! Ha! ….but could you explain Number 5 as I am rather thick and I didn’t get it.

    Reply
  • Mr Parrot 3rd June 2012

    No 5 is a bit obtuse. As in Simon Says?

    Reply
  • Trevor Rowley 3rd June 2012

    Yet again, the poor maligned monarchy get it in the neck. Roll on the revolution, I say. Can’t wait for the likes of Diane Abbott, Dennis Skinner and John Selwyn Gummer to be up there on the balcony watching the fly past with all their dodgy-in-laws in tow. They wouldn’t last longer than five minutes.

    Reply
  • Shooting Parrots 3rd June 2012

    Now now Trevor, I was very restrained I thought. Personally, I wouldn’t bother with a president, but were one required I would bar any previous holders of political office. Of course, that might mean we end up with Simon Cowell, Jordan, Wayne Rooney or perhaps even Alan Sugar, but that’s democracy for you.

    Reply
  • Trevor Rowley 4th June 2012

    Sorry, Mr.P, wasn’t a personal dig at you. It’s obvious we’re going to get the anti-monarchy lobby out at a time like this, we have to live with it. In the meantime, HMQ is more knowledgeable and better informed than we give her credit for. It is in her interest to know exactly what her ministers are up to – not just at home but also abroad. We should give her a bit more credit than we do.

    If the revolution does come, I want to nominate that chap from the Secular Society for being put up against the wall. I’d like him to sample a bit of good, honest Christian charity.

    Reply

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