I was in the coffee shop this morning waiting for my large latte and toasted teacake, picking up email on my Blackberry and generally minding my own business. I moved to one side to let someone get to the counter and thought “Shit! I’ve been standing on some chewing gum.”
Forget about smokers, the chewers and spitters of gum are the real threat to the civilised world. Or rather those that dispose of their gum with no thought for others. You only have to look at the discoloured blobs on the pavement to see how many people can’t be arsed to find a waste bin.
And the worst culprit? I have to whisper this — it’s Sir Alex. I watched the match against Lyons the other night and when the final whistle blew, he took the chud from his mouth and just threw it onto the pitch. Sacrilege.
So a month in jail please. (But in the close season.)