SledgeWe have this small family-run hardware shop nearby, by which I mean both the shop and the family are small — it hasn’t the space of B&Q; and the bloke who runs it is only about five foot four.

The point is that despite its size, they seem to have everything you could reasonably expect from a hardware shop.

It got to the point where me and Mrs P try to think of obscure things that he wouldn’t have, but he came up trumps every time. Example: we needed meths for Master P’s burner for his chemistry set and he supplied it. Probably not the best eg we have, but the only one that springs immediately to mind.

Anyway, the reason I run this testimonial is because of the predicted White Christmas. Once the snowflakes start falling, the Parrot family’s eyes look to the hills and Mrs P decided that with this in prospect, she should add to the Christmas shopping burden by putting sledges on the list.

Now you’ve all been in the shops over the last few days. Have you seen a sledge in sight? No, I didn’t think so. So in between buying prezzies, delivering prezzies etc, she has had fruitless diversions in pursuit of bits of plastic on which (possibly) to risk our necks over the holiday.

Why she didn’t think of the local hardware shop, I don’t know. How’s that for a real test? Which the shop sailed through, supplying two sledges exactly as in the above photo.

We now have three sledges which means someone will be left out of the careering downwards. And guess who will be the one not worrying the insurance companies and taking piccies instead. Yep, that’s me.

But to leave on a seasonal note, a joke of Christmas cracker variety, as heard on Five Live today: “I’ve got my grandmother a wooden leg for Christmas. It’s not her main present, just a stocking filler.” Boom boom.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

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