A swan? Ah, g’wan!

The Daily Mail was at it again today, claiming success/failure as its own with its “Bird Flu Kills British Swan” red headline. (Shouldn’t that be ‘flu’ with the apostrophes?) The poor bird died in Scotland, but as with a Scot’s victory at the Olympics that becomes ‘British’ while one from someone south of the border is always branded ‘English.’

The description of an emaciated swan floating forlornly in the Fife dock, like an opening scene from Taggart, is all meant to make it feel up close and personal, which it doesn’t. I been to Scotland; Glasgow, Edinburgh and Oban and it’s at least a three-hour drive away, and as I understand it you need a pretty personal relationship with a bird to be at risk.

But the Mail missed a double whammy in describing the swan as British. The long-necked one was also an illegal immigrant I think and potentially an unrevised commie at that. This political virus could spread to our non-migratory chickens and give a whole new meaning to Little Red Rooster.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

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