Accidents Will Happen

Accidents Will HappenI sometimes wonder if I’m fit to be let out on my own. Mrs P was away for one of her summers jollys in Anglesey this weekend so I took myself off to Stockport unaccompanied yesterday, an accident waiting to happen.

It started off quite well as I arrived earlier than usual and it wasn’t as busy, perfect for a lazy stroll around the shops, even if it was raining. The trouble started when I went to M&S.

Perhaps I was being overly ambitious in deciding on an unaccompanied coffee in the café, but I was only carrying one bag and figured I could manage to carry this and a cup and saucer from the counter to my table. What blinding over-confidence.

I’m still unsure what happened next. I was reaching for the saucer when I let my attention drift for a fateful second and the next thing I knew, my fingers had slipped and their was coffee splashing in all directions.

This was pretty embarrassing, as you can imagine, but even more so when the manageress insisted that I go round the back to the kitchen. Some of the coffee had splashed on my hand and despite my protestations that I was perfectly okay, she insisted that I hold my hand under the cold tap, no doubt suspecting that I was planning to sue M&S for serving coffee that was dangerously hot.

I probably should have left immediately to cover my shame, but I couldn’t because I’d ordered a toastie which I had to finish before I could creep away.

My clothes whiffing of spilt coffee, I had a few more errands to run before I could go home and that was when my second lesson in being unable to cope alone was dealt me.

I had been wearing a rather nice cream-coloured woollen jacket which now had a darker coffee-stained cuff and I decided to wash it. I’m no expert with the washing machine, but I know how it works, or so I thought.

I loaded it into the machine and set it at 30° as I’d been taught by Mrs P. That seemed to go okay and then, as it was raining, I put it in the dryer. Big mistake. I now own a nice woollen jacket that is one or two sizes too small.

So it was with some relief when Mrs P arrived home later that evening. Heaven knows what damage I could do myself if she’d gone for a long weekend.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

3 comments… Add yours
  • Yorkshire Pudding 13th June 2011

    Senility can strike early. Or is it early can strike senility…or stroke servile earwig cans? Now what was I doing? Nurse! Nurse!

  • Jennyta 13th June 2011

    It’s nice when men realise and admit that, without us wimmin, they are nothing…. I hope you admitted as much to Mrs P. 😉

  • Mr Parrot 13th June 2011

    Yes YP: Nurse! He’s out of bed again!

    Jenny: I had to hold my hands up about the shrunken jacket, or at least I would have if it wasn’t so tight around the armpits now!


Your email will not be published on this site, but note that this and any other personal data you choose to share is stored here. Please see the Privacy Policy for more information.

Spelling error report

The following text will be sent to our editors: