The Car Park of the Damned

CthurkeyToday is Manic Monday the news bulletins gleefully told us this morning – the day predicted to be the busiest on the High Street when we’ll spend £2.6 million a minute.

That’s collectively not individually of course, although it might feel like that by the time you’ve finished with buying all the gifts you have to give and the food and festive fripperies you absolutely need if the big day isn’t to be a disaster.

Why this should be today I’m not sure. The weather is dire and shouldn’t all these people be at work, not gadding about spending money they haven’t got on presents that nobody wants. Bah humbug!

Seriously though, you’d think people would have done their shopping online or at the weekend if push came to shove and they absolutely had to visit a shop in person. Which they seemed to have done yesterday, at least in Stockport where I live – I know because I was there.

We went there early expecting to beat the rush, but it seemed that everyone else had the same idea. You can always tell how bad it will be by the lack of spaces in the multi-storey, or The Car Park of the Damned as I call it, where the Ghosts of Christmas Presents Forgotten and doomed to wander for an eternity of fruitless searching for somewhere to pop the Nissan Micra.

But if you thought pre-Christmas was a nightmare, spare a thought for the guests of Rusty Eulberg of Lubbock, Texas, whose Christmas creation is pictured above.

It’s a roast turkey covered in strips of bacon and stuffed with an octopus with crab legs sticking out of the side. He calls it a Cthurkey as an homage to the Cthulu mythos of H P Lovecraft, no doubt soon to be available at a Marks and Spencer food hall near you.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

1 comment… Add yours
  • Christmas Pudding 24th December 2013

    Although I usually leave exceedingly witty comments on your blog, this time I just want to say Merry Christmas Ian and all the best for 2014!…I bet that was a bit of a surprise for you!


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