My round-up of news, events and stuff and nonsense from the last seven days –
if it’s news to me, it must be news to you!
Grammarian of the week: Tesco has apologised and promised to brush-up on its spelling and grammar after complaints about its baby wear that included the slogans ‘I was born awsome’ and ‘daddys little man’ minus the apostrophe.
Or maybe it was ‘awsome’ in the way that babies are supposed to make you go ‘aaah’? In which case they also spelt ‘aah’ wrong.
Bon Mots of the week: I really don’t know how I’ve managed to get to my age without these fine words to keep me going. Prepare to feel inspired, perplexed or queasy.
Life on Earth Award of the week: Learn how to correctly catch a zebra without endangering life and limb with this ‘escaped zebra drill’ film from the Ueno Zoo in Tokyo.
Embarrassing parent of the week: David Cameron’s mum signs an anti-cuts petition in protest at plans to close several children’s centres in his own constituency.
Cool cat of the week: Ice baths are a thing of the past for All Blacks star Julian Savea who has his own personal fridge to cool down in after a strenuous training session.
Lucky escape of the week: A woman falls 60 feet in the John Lewis store in Stockport, but is saved serious injury by landing on a display bed.
Elephant Flies Award: Rob Kahl broke the estate agents code by not just being honest, but brutally honest when selling a two-bedroom flat in Leigh-on-Sea, advising potential buyers to ‘wipe your feet on the way out’. It sold for £15,000 over the asking price.
Where did it all go wrong?: Shirley Williams was evacuated to the US during Word War Two and auditioned for the part in National Velvet that made Elizabeth Taylor a star. Instead, she found herself making her last speech in the House of Lords last month.
Brief lives: Actor, Frank Finlay, star of A Bouquet of Barbed Wire and the controversial Casanova in 1971; novelist Margaret Foster, author of Georgy Girl which was made into a film in 1966; Signe Anderson, co-founder of Jefferson Airplane; Abe Vigoda who played the lugubrious Sal Tessio in The Godfather. Rumours of his death first started thirty years ago making him something of a cult figure.