Sunday Round-up

My round-up of news, events and stuff and nonsense from the last seven days.
If it’s news to me, it must be news to you!

Avast behind: Penzance fell short in its bid to win back the world record to gather the most pirates in one place when 77 of the crew were still carousing in a pub when the count was taken. They can take heart that it will soon be Talk Like A Pirate Day.

Terror alert: A secret test of security at the Palace of Westminster showed that 100 MPs could be massacred in less than five minutes.

The right angle: Researchers at the University of New South Wales claim that the ancient Babylonians developed trigonometry superior to the modern version.

I don’t believe it: The fallout from the US eclipse continues with people turning up at A&E having put sunscreen on their eyeballs as a substitute for those special glasses.

Quote of the week: One that surely applies to the Brexiteers who keep banging on about the simplicity of the question in last year’s referendum.

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is clear, simple and wrong.

H L Mencken

Saucy democracy: Despite the large number of young people who turned out to vote at the last general election, their knowledge of parliament is pretty sketchy. Two-thirds of 18- to 25-year-olds think that ‘filibustering’ is a slang term for a sex act.

Sound of silence: After the hoo-ha over the silencing of Big Ben, Legoland is imitating real life by silencing their own version while they carry out repairs, albeit for a considerably shorter time span.

Fake news: Fox News anchor Jesse Watters reported that sharks had been seen swimming around Houston following Hurricane Harvey having been taken in by a Photoshopped image on Twitter.

It simply isn’t cricket:  Carew Cricket Club declared on 18 for 1 after just two and a half over in their title deciding match against Cresselly thus preventing their rivals getting the bonus points that would have handed them the title.

Dust to dust: Should you wish to achieve a kind of immortality you can have your ashes incorporated into a vinyl recording of whatever message you wish to leave for posterity.

Brief lives: Director of Texas Chain Saw Massacre Tobe Hooper; world-class puzzlist Laurie Brokenshire; black satirist Dick Gregory; rockabilly star Sonny Burgess; Irish rugby legend Willie Duggan; TMS commentator Ralph Dellor ; Million Dollar Man’s sidekick Richard Anderson and; Cardinal Cormac Murphy.

Nobody’s prefect. If you find any spelling mistakes or other errors in this post, please let me know by highlighting the text and pressing Ctrl+Enter.

6 comments… Add yours
  • Yorkshire Pudding 3rd September 2017

    I hope that you and Madam Parrot have not been overdoing the filibustering recently as it can play havoc with your back.

    As for last year’s Yes/No Brexit vote, it was always far too simplistic. No wonder Cameron appears to have gone into hiding. He was like the Pied Piper of Hamelin. What an unmitigated and self-made disaster! And still nobody’s talking about the Russian involvement.

    • Mr Parrot 3rd September 2017

      ‘Call me Dave’ was a pretty poor Pied Piper since he only convinced the rats to vote against him!

      • Trevor Rowley 6th September 2017

        …or, as Sonny and Cher would have us believe, “The Bleat Goes On.” How was the Yes/No vote simplistic? It was a referendum to decide whether or not we should remain in the increasingly unpopular EU – you couldn’t polish it up to be anything else. The fact that people now don’t like the outcome is an unfortunate consequence, but one that we have to adapt to. As the Speaker, John Bercow, might say, “Gentlemen, you really must compose yourselves. Take some deep breaths.”

        • Yorkshire Pudding 6th September 2017

          Simplistic because nobody fully knows what “Leave” voters were voting for given the fact that Britain can never entirely leave Europe. We will always be connected with it in various ways. Now politicians are interpreting what the narrow “Leave” vote meant with regard to immigration, trade, legal rights etc.. I know people who voted “Leave” believing this would stop ALL immigration into Britain and I know people who voted “Leave” simply because they wanted Britain to disentangle itself from the European courts. It’s all an utter mess whether you voted “Leave” or “Remain” and it is a massive distraction at a time when governmental focus should be on jobs, the NHS, schools, the environment, housing. So you take a deep breath Trevor and try to see things clearly old chap.

          • Trevor Rowley 10th September 2017

            I would imagine that I see things no less clearly than you do, young Pudding. It’s how we choose to interpret them that creates the difference. Your determination that you are right all the time about everything is a little obvious, to say the least.

  • Roger Green 6th September 2017

    “Hey, baby, wanna filibuster?”
    Now THAT’S a come-on line!


Your email will not be published on this site, but note that this and any other personal data you choose to share is stored here. Please see the Privacy Policy for more information.

Spelling error report

The following text will be sent to our editors: